I remember the first time I died
Transcript
So I am at Robert Miles house. I’ve just made my third character, and this is his third campaign. He’s showing me the lands drawn out on a piece of science graph paper. Green with 5:1 small squares to large grid. There is a city here on the coast and some woods. A Village on the way to the mountains, and drawn in the mountains is a door.
Robert says “But you don’t want to go there. Anyone who opens the door dies.”
I am perplexed. “Someone will just tunnel around the door.”
“Nope, doesn’t work.” Proclaims Robert. “And teleporting in doesn’t work either. The only way into the dungeon is through the door. But anyone who opens it dies.”
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“Well I guess there is no point in making maps for that dungeon. No one will ever go in it.”
Robert Miles’ face lights up with pure triumph. “Oh, I’ve made it.” He pulls out two sheets of science graph paper detailed to the margins with the largest, most complex maze ever designed.
“There is some really great stuff in here too.” He seems to realize I’m looking at his maps and he holds them up to his chest like cards. “But you are not going in there today. You have to go to the Temple.” He puts the maps away and points to the city on the coast. “Here.”
So this priest briefs my character on where I have to go, what to dowhen I get there, who to talk too, who the bad guy is, and what I have to destroy of theirs. Then Rober Miles asks “What do you do?”
“Ok, so I leave the city.” Then I review my mission aloud with Rober while making notes on my character sheet. So I wont forget. What I have to Destroy. The bad guy’s Name. My contacts name. What to do in town. And . . . And . . . the name of the town . . .?
I look up from my character sheet “And what was the name of that town” I ask him.
Robert turns up his nose. It sounds like he is condemning a criminal.
“You don’t know.”
“Aw come on Robert, this is a lot to memorize. Why do you think I’m writing it down?”
He just shakes his head. Even Purses his lips. I can tell he’s not going to budge.
“I go back to the temple and _ask _” I tell Robert.
He looks crushed. Rallying quickly he says the door is locked.
“I knock.”
“The door opens and there is a Priest. But he is in black robes with a pentagram necklace and black curtains line the halls.” Robert looks smug.
Exasperated I say to Robert “Ok. Let me get this. I’ve been gone for ten minutes. And in that time, some evil cult has come and killed every single priest. Taken out all the furniture, cleaned up all the blood spills, redecorated, and filled the entire place with new priests of an evil cult!?” I try and catch my breath.
Robert says “Yep.” And nods once.
I find myself wearing the air of being defeated. Sadly I say “Well I guess I’ll just go to this place then, and see if I can figure it out.” And I feebly point to the only village on his map.
This seems to work. Robert it rolling dice. Telling me how far along the road I’ve gotten. Where I sleep. How much food I have left.
He’s doing all the dice rolling, decision making, all the describing. As long as I continue to look properly sad and contrite, steady progress is made. The village gets closer.
Then I have an encounter. It is a giant Owl. We are of similar alignments so it joins me. Excuse me for getting happy but this is the coolest thing that has ever happened to me. I have a giant owl for a friend.!
Robert Miles says “tomorrow” and this time he rolls the dice behind a book “you have an accident.” He rolls again. You fall on your weapon.” He rolls again. “You take 12 points of damage and you Die.”
“That’s not possible.”
“Yes it is.”
“I show him my character sheet. “I have a glaive. The glaive is taller than I am. I mean what are you saying. That some how I flipped the glaive end over end, aimpailed myself on it, and did max damage so I would Die!?”
“Yep.” He nods once.
He sits there in silence. I’m thinking to myself that I need to stop giving the DM ideas. I feel kinda sad.
Suddenly Robert says “Ok. The owl resurrects you.”
I say “Let’s go make some cool-aid.”
“Ok.” He says, and we do.
David Michael Grouchy II